Saturday, March 15, 2014
when I ever learn to love others?
To think about it, there have been a number of people who showed a lot of love and care for me but I don't seem to be able to appreciate them all the time. I fail to love them back, I fail to show equal amount of care. I honestly think I'm extremely lucky to have parents who would just spend so much money on me (for academics and braces and all that shyt ) some idiot who spent $100 plus and so much effort on my birthday present, I mean...it's really kinda dumb cause Idk I just don't get how one can do such a thing. RWARRR I don't get myself. I'm really grateful to be love but somehow I can't give back love to these people. I feel that I'm not loving the people around me enough I guess? I got the feeling that I'm like a black hole for love, I keep taking in the love people give to me but I do not give back. Honestly speaking the only person I think I've ever love is probably myself, I feel that all that I get are things I deserve, I feel that having people being nice to me is only right and those who are not nice, they are just wrong, they are just the bad. I can't seem to love others. Not as much as I love myself at least... I don't think I'll ever be able to love anyone more than myself or ever love anyone else, truely..