Friday, January 17, 2014


Honestly speaking everyday is really least for me. I get so tired just by trying to complete all my homework....Haish. Not to forget the tests and quizzes. So some updates about how I feel, still kinda shytty and kinda not coping.Well. First big event(probably kinda big and main thing that happen), I got scammed. LOL it didnt really happen recently but basically I just got scammed ($30 just gone like this. yep.) Not very cool but Idk why I just dont feel anything already. And yeah, I just forgive the intashop owner like that.. don't know why either. I'm so weird. And, my blackberry phone is been away from me for a week or so already. Haish. I'm like lazy to go get back my phone too... too tired. And pretty much that's it. My life is actually very boring and dry. Homework takes up more than 70% of my time.. Zzz

 Yep. My hobby is taking selfies on beryl's phone whenever I'm out with her.

                         KEKE. Candid.

 Even though it's the same box of fries..I just had to take 4 shots of it. Can't blame me. 
Anyways the green sauce is the wasabi sauce that the shop make. (kinda like their own sauce if I'm not wrong)

 Fries. Popcorn chicken. Seaweed chicken. Milktea. (ILOVECHICKEN)
 MORE CHICKEN. To think about it, these chickens sacrifice their life for me...I'm grateful.


 CANDIDDDD. (she actually know that I'm taking photo of her.)


 Cennic took this. Don't look too bad huh? But I really didnt know she was taking photo. LOLOLOL
 HEHE. At my dental place. Look carefully and you will realise that the donkey is wearing braces too. xD
 Chawin bought this for Siqi from thai. It's pretty. MEOW.
 Probably gonna get this wallet. (If I have the money)
 PIZZAAAAAA. So sweet of the teachers to treat us to pizza...Meow -TOUCHED-
 Cat photos Siqi sent. MEOWWWW. I want a pet cat:(((

 And super fluffy dogs:333333
This is really funny. HEHE. And that's the end. -WAVES- BYEBYEEEEE
I hate the feeling when I am with a group of people are together and I feel invisible. That feeling sucks. I don't even know why I even feel that why. Sometimes it feels as though I am talking to this person but he/she is not even listening. Idk why. It's like we are talking but none of us is listening. Feels like everybody is just trying so hard to express ourselves, to the extend that we neglect the people around us. Even if they are important people to us. Sometimes I feel that i don't even understand my closest friends. I don't get certain things, i don't get why they react in a certain manner to certain things and I just don't seem to get them. At least not all the time. A friend once said that I''m the stupid kind of person amongst my friends, cause I don't try to understand my friends and am often the happy-go-lucky kind of person which isn't quite the characteristic I want myself to have. I mean being lucky is good, but living by luck is bad. I don't want it to be that I do everything base on my luck and one day run out of luck and everything topples. Also, it's annoying how I try to understand but it's not always up to me.. Unlike academics, unlike math or language, it's not like I want to do it, I'll be able to do it you know? I can practice if i want to do well for math. I can read, write listen to the language to learn it well. But what can I do to maintain a friendship? I can't possibly go like "Hey, tell me everything." I'll only pull off to be a creepy asshole. I try as much as possible not to be a control freak, I try as much as possible to let things go with the flow and the flow is just that I don't get so close to these friends. I mean I tried and I'm just not getting it so just forget about it? Focus my energy on other stuff? I'm tired of always being the last to know certain things, I'm tired of only being called out when people need something from me, I'm really tired. I'm just gonna deal with it. Deal with being always alone, deal with always being boring.

Tuesday, January 14, 2014


Another tiring day. I dont even know what to feel for today. Sometimes I feel that everytime I speak, the world is waiting to have a good laugh at me. I feel that people do not actually call for me until I'm somehow needed. I have my insecurities but I try not to show them. I am tired of people looking at me and thinking that everything that has ever been done by me is easy. I mean it may not be fantastic work done but I tried and I just really hope to just take a break. I wish for a time when I could just be carefree though I know such a time would never exist. But sometimes its just so tiring living everyday..

Monday, January 13, 2014

unhappy day: 13thJan2014

The day that I get back my Chinese O's result. got A1 but I don't know why I just don't feel that happy. I mean I put in a lot of effort. It's definitely not pure luck just didn't feel right.
I realized I am a super big sucker. Like I am always staring at things I don't have. I'm the kind who will always be staring at other people's things, things that I will never get or something. For those things that I already achieved, I tend to take them for granted and forget the long and tedious process I went through in order to get them. It's such a horrible habit. It makes me feel as though I will never be contented. I hate it. But I can't deny that this bad habit is what keeps me moving forward. Just imagine, not having an aim, not having something that you want to achieve, nothing will be done. At the same time, it makes me feel so miserable. The mixed feeling that I feel today. HORRIBLE. Feeling so horrible right now I don't even want to do anything....but nah. I should still try to complete my homework.....Zzz

Saturday, January 11, 2014


Well. I feel that my first week of lessons was pretty horrible. Even though ironically, I took quite a number of photos and I look super happy in all the photos. Anyways. some of the photos are in my noob blackberry which got confiscated by teacher. Yeahh. One reason why my first week of lessons kinda suck. Secondly, cause I somehow became the vice chairman of the class. Which is like shyt cause I don't actually want to be a vice chairman anddddd having all the teachers going on and on about how its important that the vice chairman should be a role model to the class and crap not, which obviously I can't be one.....LOL I just don't like to be limited by rules and regulations. I prefer to just do what I want and ignore all the other things... Zzz
Not to forget the homework and lessons that I can't actually catch up with. Urghhhhh. I am not coping with this.....D:
HAISH I'll just let the photos do some talking thenn.

This tiger took me about 4days to finish...its kinda ugly actually.. meh. 
wanted to finish it before 2014 but failed:/

these 4 cuties are ligers. (lion+tiger) really cool cuties.

My new notebooks(^ ^) I actually have 1 more but I'm too lazy to take pic of that

In the school toilet. Pretty cool if it was to be taken with professional camera and by photographers.

I think it will look cool. :))


    In ngeeann poly toilet(I have a thing for mirror shots) p.s my hand was shaky. 
Pretty Jovita in the Ngeeann poly booklet. SUPER PRETTTTYYYYYYY :OOO

Pretty cakepops from ngeeann poly :9

 On a horrible saturday morning when I had to go back to school, thi cute fam made me really happy.
Especially their baby girl. She is super adorableeeee. (they were taking selfies on the bus. SUPER CUTEEEE) I feel like a creep when i took photo of them but meh whateverrrr. 

 CAT POST ITS that I took from Alice....Just soooooo cute. (lacking of vocab once again)

 CARONNNN->One of the funniest girl in class. Love teasing her xP


 Tall Sriraam being tall


 Signing off with the pretty cat photo sent to me from berylong. BAIBAI. Hopefully whoever that ever reads this will have better luck than me and may Lord's blessings always be with you:))